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Messages from Dr. Eberlin, Dreher's Principal

Dr. Eberlin's Dad Joke Fridays (and sometimes, Thursdays):

 Why can’t humans hear a dog whistle?  Because dogs cannot whistle!

What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?  Hailing taxis!

What’s the best time of the year to play on a trampoline?  Springtime!

Why didn’t the hamburger buns ever get along?  Because they always have beef between them!

How do you get an astronaut’s baby to sleep?  You rocket! 

Why should you sit in a corner when you get cold?  Because most corners are 90 degrees!

What did the snowman say after losing his arm?  "I’m never playing fetch again!"

How does a penguin build its house?  Igloos it together!

 My brother and I laugh sometimes about how competitive we are.  But I laugh harder.

Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?  Of course it can, a house can’t jump!

What’s the difference between a crocodile and an alligator?  You will see one in a while and the other one later.

What animal is the worst at playing hide-and-seek?  A leopard because he’s always spotted! 

What is a pony with a sore throat called?  A little hoarse!

What do you call a pig who does karate?  A pork-chop!

What is a cow’s favorite subject?  Geo-moo-try! 

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up?  Because it was two-tired! 

What kind of pants does a ghost wear?  Just a paranormal pants!

 Why don’t werewolves ever know the time?  Because they’re not whenwolves!

It's Dr. Eberlin's Dad Joke Thursday (in celebration of Halloween): What is the one room that ghosts do not need in their house?  A living room!

It's Dad Joke Friday!  What's orange and sounds like a parrot?  A carrot! 

What happened to the frog who parked illegally?  He got toad away! 

What is the difference between ignorance and apathy?  I don’t know and I don’t care!

Dr. Eberlin's 12 Days of Holiday Dad Jokes:

 

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?  Claus-trophobic!  

Who does Santa call when his sleigh breaks down?  The Abominable Towman! 

Why does Ebeneezer Scrooge love Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?  Because every buck is dear to him! 

What do you call an elf who runs away from Santa’s workshop?  A rebel without a Claus!

What do gingerbread men use when they break their legs?  Candy canes

How did the reindeer learn to play piano?  He was elf-taught!

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?  Ice Crispies!